After Oliver and David tackled the night weaning a week or so ago, the landscape of my life is finally changing. No longer am I shackled to the bed most of the night nursing, such being the life of an attachment parent/on-demand nurser. I can get up and clean up, shower, work on projects, read, what have you. It is still sinking in that my day no longer ends at 8:45 p.m. Imagine how much I can accomplish now!
This has got me thinking about who I was before Oliver came along. I was running my own architecture business and I was in the best shape of my life. I pulled up some pictures of myself from that time frame. It's crazy to think how big I thought I was back then! Oof! But what I feel today is hopeful. Looking at myself and what I was able to do back then....it's only five years later, can it really be that hard to do again? Back then I was 36, 37, 38 years old, metabolism was in full effect from nursing and following Weight Watchers (yes, I admit it), and EVERYTHING in my closet fit. Seeing these photos of myself might provide more inspiration than looking at a fashion magazine or blog. This is me, the very flesh and bone I'm wearing now! Maybe I can do this again!
It is wild to think I've been performing onstage since December of last year and that has not motivated me to get into better shape (that might just be the nature of the performing I'm doing, it really is okay to just be whoever you are, I totally get that). Or the fact that I have about seven dresses that fit but can't squeeze into any of my pants. Intellectually that should be a HUGE motivator. I love my clothes and I want to wear them! Obviously this stuff goes deep. I have my "good" excuses, Stella and Oliver, my two ten-pound babies. But Stella is back in school now and Oliver fits snugly into the jogging stroller. I live near a giant park. When will it be GO time? How about....starting....NOW!
What's this....a jaw line?!
This photo used to make me cringe. Not anymore.